Monday, March 2, 2015

Lets discuss my ex >:D *name s are changed **names that have a similaritly are completly coincidental dont think its especially about people you know ***everything aside from names are true

Let discuss my ex, Josh. Because i'm in the mood to express my encounter of 'true love.'
 Josh is one of those guys who on first look is the dream guy. The guy who is every girls dream. I loved his wit and his boyish charm and couldn't fathom why he was always being dumped by every girl he dated.

O christ if i could go back now and bitch smack myself. The mans a twat, he dumped me after a year of dating, not that unheard of and i only cried about three days before getting over it. this prick continued to call me and come over to my house to hang out. it was like the idiot broke up with me, the fuck would i want him around me for a while. but maybe thats why i was constantly thinking eventually we'd get back together! But oh no, it was the constant flirting and the snuggling and kissing. Oh and to make matters worse he moved into my house because he made it seem like his family ABANDONED HIM. His parents went on a honeymoon and brought his grandparents along so they could have a nice anniversary. 

Just to find out when I was at my dads one weekend he made out with my best friend.

She had no idea about the situation, then started the whole thing about him going off home studies to go back to normal school. So my mom put in all this time and money to get him back into school, just so he could fuck it all up. The fuckin' idiot decided that it was okay for a 19 yr old man to date a 13 year old girl, oh and here's the kicker, SHE'S MY YOUNGER COUSIN THAT HAPPENS TO HAVE THE SAME NAME AS ME.

That same name thing comes into play a little down the line.

So he proceeds to date her for like a week before my mother, father, aunt and uncle told them to stop dating which then causes them to be watched like a hawk by Morgan and me. The jackass dumps her and ends up dating another girl within the same day. She hated me for awhile then ended up dating another guy, and Josh dated a girl that everyone said looked a lot like me. There's where the name thing comes in!

The problem is everyone tried to tell me that it was obvious he wasn't over me and i insisted it wasn't true. I don't know maybe im just blind to the truth.

Anyway, Josh had a bad habit of springing random shit on us like suddenly deciding to bring his girlfriend to my niece's birthday party. That one was a trip, morning before school;

Josh: Hey by the way my girlfriends coming over for Lizzie's party tonight.

Me: huh?

So I decided to get back at him in a most amusing way, with my helpful cosmetologist sister. I decked my self out, there wasn't a single person that didn't tell me how beautiful I was, So after the party I went home, turns out the girl is also staying at my house for the night. By the way my mom and dad had no clue that Josh's girlfriend was coming over, they didn't know until she arrived at our house that day. Then when we got home he had the nerve to say that I was dressed inappropriately I looked him square in the eyes and told him "Fuck you this is my house I dress how I want."

Then we go a week or so down the line he's cryin' like a bitch in my brother's room. Because she broke up with him, he was going on about how she was the love of his life and he was going to marry her. And i'm sitting there like, the fuck would you marry someone you don't even fully know? Then like an hour later the phone rings and hes suddenly back together with her. yeah such tragedy you were apart for but a day.

Then a month later he sleeps with her.
And I overhear a conversation of him breaking up with her!
He dated her for three months to get in her pants.
Then dumped her when he got what he wanted.

No wonder he dumped me, sexiest thing we did was french kiss at the library.

How fucking stupid. 

Then it proceeds to be about his grades, I wanted to fucking hit him with a shovel. He refused to take one of his mid-semester finals, 90% of the time he wasn't at his class he was out smoking weed. he'd piss away any money that he had on pot, or stupid shit like these super fine decorative Japanese blades, he fucking destroyed them in seconds. $180 pissed down the drain because he though you could use them to chop wood.

So after all the time my mom put into getting him back to normal school she had to get him enrolled in a different school that was strictly on computers, then the idget gets the nerve to go about and nearly flunk point and click academy. I was glad i didn't go to his graduation because in all honesty he didn't fucking deserve it.

The asshole also had this issue about hygiene, He went four MONTHS, not days not weeks MONTHS without a FUCKING SHOWER. Brush teeth, Brush hair, yeah totally keeping hygienic. This was so disgusting, no one wanted to let him in the house because he smelt so bad!

And he left Porn magazines out where my little brother could see them. He couldn't even fathom why everyone was pissed at him. my brother just about had a fucking panic attack because the air in their room was unbreathble.        

Literally my 15 year old brother comes to me in tears on the verge of having an anxiety attack, having trouble breathing in his room with the window open and a fan on.

So then after I go to college I find out all this stuff he was doing.

Like he would take my little brother on walks and stuff one day my youngest brother *8* is with his friend and josh on a walk. Next day my little brother is suspended from school for having pot in his backpack. My 8 year old brother has it in his Permanent record that he brought pot to school, Guess who freaked when a cop rounded the corner while he was smoking a joint and thus decided to hide the evidence in the little boys bag. same shit head who let the little boy smoke pot.

I wanted to literally kill him.

Thank god that faggot is gone. I hate him so much more then a normal person should hate someone.

And the worst thing about it is that if i had never dated him then this all could have been avoided.

'Hell haveth no fury like a woman's scorn, 
Especially if said woman is a jilted lover.'

BITCH OUT            


Friday, February 13, 2015

you know what grinds my gears?: teens who think they're all that and the new iphone.

yes so i know everyone went through the dark time of the 8 month SWAG and YOLO plague. Thank god that was overused and died from attention whores suffocating them. This is the result of the lazy parents who had the little shits from ten yeas ago. lets face it, the fact that the definition of teen is no longer 'zit-faced/porn retard' and now has to be defined as the idiotic names they've been calling themselves. So somehow we have to develop a society that is the future with a bunch of idiots that have the glass-eyed dreams of being lazy whores and pot-heads that don't work and still have enough money to go on and do whatever they want. I mean is it so wrong to want them to have their parents boot their asses to the curb and have them live without their shit for a month.

Imagine it; a world where stupid people no longer exist anymore should be the entire nations dream!
                  all of them being completly null in society.
why we could walk the streets without ignorance polluting everything! but alas we still need to live in this reality where it is accetable to do nothing and receive something.

I mean look at it this way, the path we're letting the kids go down involves them becoming more and more ignorant and egostical. the kids today believe they're heading into the world with everything they need. reality is they're going out there with a bun in the oven and a pocketful of hemp filled dreams.

Recall the tale of the cricket and the ants,
the cricket was an unprepared bastard, the ants were worthy litle dicks get over it

Bitch Out  

Friday, October 24, 2014

You know what grinds my gears?: Lazy Parents.

You know the type, the kind who sit by and let their kids scream kick and basically break a bunch of shit and treat people like crap. I hate kids. BECAUSE. OF. THESE. PEOPLE.

I just love it because they have a little brat running around and its obvious that they don't care what the little shit is doing, and quiet frankly don't care as long as they don't bother them. so you have them sitting there usually at a store, like the gap or a freakin' McDonalds and you just wanna pretty much bitch smack the kid.

Oh and god help it if you try to tell the kid "stop'' or something, their parent (usually the mom) comes running up, cussing and telling you something like "you cant talk to my child like that"
"who do you think you are"
and your sitting there like "I'm doing YOUR parenting job, you freakin idiot"  then you just wind up in a cuss out battle with an irrate women who's in denial about her little brat. i mean its like spnk the fuckin kid instead of telling them no, you dumb bitch. hope your fuckin kid bites someone with AIDS.

I'll tell you one thing i was spanked as a child and i now suffer a mental condition called "RESPECT FOR OTHERS"

The youth of tomorrow are being poisoned by the messages of today, 
"hate everyone for no reason and be stupid for every reason."


Monday, October 6, 2014

These Ignorant Fucks


So i get home last night and apparently because i'm the only person in the whole fucking house who flushes toilet paper down the toilet like it's supposed to be, the toilet got clogged. So now i'm not even allowed to use the fucking restroom in the apartment anymore, but that's not what has me pissed off, what has me pissed off is the fact that they've resorted to shitting in bags. not even joking, i got home and then the first thing i see is the oldest girl walking out of the bathroom with a bag in her hand and she went outside to throw it in the trash.

I'm so glad that i'm not going to be there after wednesday. 

Sunday, October 5, 2014


Okay so i was sleeping soundly and getting rest after a long day of working on my project for school. when in my dream i suddenly smelt honeysuckle. i hate honeysuckle because it's to sweet smelling, this woke me up to my roommate freaking out over a colony of ants that had been clusterfucking over a sandwhich she left in her dresser. she had the bright idea to kill the ants with a can of air freshner.
and they accuse me of stealing and hiding food.
i almost suffocated over that disgusting shit. then she has the nerve to walk over and spray me with it while i was "asleep" i just about jumped up and shoved the can down her throat.

what kind of a fucking loser uses air freshiner that bad to kill ants?

For it wasn't the scent of lavender that seduced me, but the scent of your soul rotting away that led me astray.

Friday, October 3, 2014

seriously for glancing at the fucking tv.....

I came home today, you know being the only girl in the apartment who has to go to school three days a week, i'd like to sit and relax when i get home. But you see the others pitched in together to by cable because they so totally were just DYING without it. Anyhow i got home and was sitting there chilling in the living room watching some Futurama, you know minding my own. When out of nowhere the oldest of the girls is suddenly saying i have to pay for a portion of the cable because i watched literally 5 minutes of tv.
and it's like alright, did i flip it to this channel? no. did i want to watch futurama? no, i wanted to watch Boondocks on netflix. Did i have any say in what they're watching? no, like i want to sit there and watch Keeping up with the Kardashians. So now i can't even sit in the fucking living room because they'll whine about how i'm watching tv. yes i'm glancing at the tv from time to time, but that's out of habit. You can't  say i'm using  the damn tv if i'm just watching YOUR shows. it's still YOUR tv, still YOUR cable and still YOUR control of the damn thing.
get over yourself you fucking control freaks.

reminder *blah* everyday *blah* pathetic lives

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

You know what grinds my gears: Pity Party People

Yeah so you know what i'm gonna bitch about,
People who think there lives are independently the worst thing to happen in all of existence. You know the kind their the kind that when you sit there and try to enjoy their company and tell them about how you just lost a loved one or had something stolen from you and they sit their and are like
"Oh yeah that's sad, reminds me of when my crackhead mom beat me over the head with a bat."
And your just sitting there like,
 "OK when in the fuck did i say anything that could have even remotely been in relation to your life?"
What makes it worse is when you have the person actually try to invoke feelings of pity from you. It's like who the hell do you think you are? A person who expects shit for their sad life is not a person deserving of my respect.
Like take my ex for example; He truley believed he had the worst life ever and used it as a way to get women to date him. He had a mom and dad that abused him, he quotes that his cousin who took him in said that his parents would beat him. here's the kicker he doesn't remember his parents, which of course leaves one to question why it is then he acts like he's still being beaten by them!

And i'm sitting there like; "okay and you live here because your adopted father was telling you, a 19yr.old layabout, that you had to go to school to get a job. Here at MY home, you believe you can do nothing and expect my mother to take care of everything for you. Hope you get buried alive you useless twat."

It's like he had nothing better to do! and it's fine if you don't talk about your life, i ain't askin ya for your life's story. you can keep to yourself because i could really give less of an amazing amount of fucks i have available for your life that you so graceciously want, YOU FUCKING DRAMA WHORES.

May everyday you live be a reminder of your sad, pathetic, and pointless life.